The bill is here, and we're all just looking at it

It’s that moment after the last coffee cup is cleared away. The server leaves the little black folder right in the middle of the table, and suddenly, everyone’s eyes are on their phones, or the ceiling, or the last crumbs on their plate. We all know what’s happening, but no one wants to be the one to say it first.

The quiet standoff

Someone will make a joke about splitting it. Another will offer to pay, but it sounds more like a question than a statement. I just sit there, staring at the two options in my head: offer to pay it all, or let the awkward math begin.It’s not about the money, not really. It’s the weight of the decision. It’s the mental energy of calculating who ordered what, who had the extra drink, and whether anyone will feel slighted. My brain starts running through scenarios that don’t even matter.

When the choice is the problem

I remember one lunch where we must have sat for five minutes in silence, just looking at the bill. Two perfectly fine, reasonable choices were right there. Pay or split. Yet, picking one felt like committing to a whole personality.Would paying make me look like I was showing off? Would insisting on splitting seem cheap? The thoughts just looped. It was exhausting for something so small. All I wanted was for the moment to be over, for the choice to be made so we could just leave.

A simple way out

That’s when I wished for something else to decide. Not me, not my friend, just a neutral third party. A coin flip. A game of rock-paper-scissors. Anything to take the burden off and make it feel fair, without the overthinking.

The relief of not choosing

There’s a real lightness when the decision is taken from you. When it’s random, it’s just fate. No one’s feelings are attached to it. You can all just shrug, accept it, and move on with your day. The mental chatter finally stops.